I'd give anything to be normal. I hate everything about this.
[ Ryoji looks down at his feet. ]
You're right. But... I'm so weak. I'm... I can't stand to be alone, to be without you.
I'm horrible, and nothing but a weak person who can't depend on himself, or live without others.
[ Ryoji looks away--anywhere but Minato. It's the truth, and he hates... facing it. ]
Even so... I'm so weak that I can't do anything without depending on others, and clinging to them. Especially you. And I... I hate that about myself. I... I want to be someone who people will like. But...
What's the point when I'm going to disappear in the end?
[ A pained glance, and he closes his eyes. ] That's right... in the end, I'll disappear completely anyway... so that feeling isn't invalid, no matter how hard I fight it... all I've done since day one is drag others down, or worse. I don't... deserve anything else than what's going to happen.
I'm a worthless murderer. All that experiment did was unleash a monster. You all deserve better than... whatever I am.
[ He blinks a few times, looking down. ]
All the things I've done... are so horrible. The things I did in the past--how could I possibly atone for all the people I've killed? ... Even Yukari's father... I don't deserve to be your friend, or anyone else's.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2011-05-11 08:46 am (UTC)[ He bites his lip. ]
I'd give anything to be normal. I hate everything about this.
[ Ryoji looks down at his feet. ]
You're right. But... I'm so weak. I'm... I can't stand to be alone, to be without you.
I'm horrible, and nothing but a weak person who can't depend on himself, or live without others.
[ Ryoji looks away--anywhere but Minato. It's the truth, and he hates... facing it. ]
Even so... I'm so weak that I can't do anything without depending on others, and clinging to them. Especially you. And I... I hate that about myself. I... I want to be someone who people will like. But...
What's the point when I'm going to disappear in the end?
[ A pained glance, and he closes his eyes. ] That's right... in the end, I'll disappear completely anyway... so that feeling isn't invalid, no matter how hard I fight it... all I've done since day one is drag others down, or worse. I don't... deserve anything else than what's going to happen.
I'm a worthless murderer. All that experiment did was unleash a monster. You all deserve better than... whatever I am.
[ He blinks a few times, looking down. ]
All the things I've done... are so horrible. The things I did in the past--how could I possibly atone for all the people I've killed? ... Even Yukari's father... I don't deserve to be your friend, or anyone else's.